How to make baozi

Step 1: Locate some flour and water. Might sound easy, but just imagine if the flour package was covered in scribbles that look like they should mean something to you but actually are just there to taunt you.  Mush up flour and yeast so that it looks like a lump of pale-coloured excrement. Go have a glass of wine for an hour, your lump needs to rest.

Step 2: Locate some vegetables. Guess whether vegetables are actually grass or something edible. Mix up vegetables with some kind of protein.

Step 3: Wake up your dough by punching it. Roll it into little Mexican hats.

Step 4: With extreme difficulty, making sure you get filling all over your hands, face, hair and clothes, shove grass into flat baozi so it becomes round baozi. Cover it with muslin while you spend 20 excruciating minutes on each bun.

Step 5: Steal the teacher's baozi and pretend they were yours. Lap up the praise for your clever handiwork and then see how many baozi you can shove in your mouth at any one time. This will not get you as much praise as the teacher's handiwork, but it will be worthwhile nonetheless.

Post Script (24 June 2012): I made these at home and they were totally similar to the ones we did in class! My friends were super impressed :)