The S curve

I’m a third of the way through my time here now. I’ve passed the two month mark. In our training before I left, I was told that I should expect a bit of a U curve in terms of my happiness overseas. That means at first you’re on a bit of a high, because what you’ve been looking forward to for months is finally here. You get to do cool stuff like go to the Forbidden City and see the Great Wall. You’re meeting new friends, buying cheap alcohol and having a great time. But then it starts to settle in that you’re away from everyone you love and you start to notice the annoying things about this crazy new world—like the fact that you can never get on a subway without being pushed around, and you have no idea what is in the contents of your food. Eventually, you come full circle as you start to get used to your new life; settle in and start to explore the things you didn’t expect to enjoy before you came, like the new fruits that come into season every week and the joy of a clear sky once in a month or so.

Because my brain likes to overthink things in minute detail, I think my u bend is actually an S bend, and it started from when I found out I’d be leaving. I was on a high, excited about going somewhere new and challenging, excited about the personal and professional gains and thrilled with the victory of winning the place. But then I started to worry about every possible negative thing—the smog, the big city atmosphere, the language barrier, the lack of a support network. Then when I finally got here I realised it’s no way near as bad as I thought it would be! This place is great fun! The friends I’m making are wonderful and there are so many things I can’t get at home. Even learning Mandarin is exciting and motivating.

This is where the S bend starts. Think an S lying on its side, so it kind of looks like a u and an n joined together. When I got here I was riding up the side of the u, and I am now afraid that I’m plateauing across the top of the n. The new exciting stuff is getting boring, and I’m starting to get sick of constantly dealing with my inability to communicate with everyone. I’m really really missing everyone at home, and I constantly think about the day when I’ll get to see them again.

Or maybe this is just a volatile ride—one week you’re flying high and the next week you can’t imagine how you will possibly make it to the end. Let’s hope so, because I really don’t want to slide down the other side of the n!